Do You Remember Where You Were?

I will never forget that day.  I will always remember where I was, who I was with, and the emotions that I was feeling.  I will never forget the panic I felt when we couldn't reach our family members who were in NYC that day, possibly at WTC. 

I was a sophomore in college at USF so of course I had realized that me and morning classes did not mix.  I was asleep in my dorm room when Matt, one of my dorm mates, woke me up pounding on my bedroom door.  He was in the Marines and needed to borrow my iron.  I had no idea what he was talking about and he told me that we were under attack, he needed to press his uniform and wait for instructions, and I needed to turn on the TV.  I turned on the TV just as the second plane hit the second tower.  I saw it live on the Today Show.  I will never forget hearing Matt Lauer talking and the disbelief/shock/surprise in his voice when that second plane hit.  I will also never forget that image.  That video is forever engrained in my mind. I remember feeling scared and confused.  I remember finally getting a hold of my mom to ask if she'd heard from my aunt and cousins.  I can't remember if my cousin and his wife were living in the city at the time or if they were still in Conneticut but I do know they were in the city and had planned on visiting WTC that day.  We were all frantic wondering if we were one of those unfortunate few who lost loved ones.  After a few hours we were able to get through to them.  Thankfully they opted to visit WTC the day before.  We were all so relieved.  USF had cancelled classes for the rest of the day.  We all gathered in each other's rooms and the lobby of our dorm (love all my Leadership House peeps!) to watch the rest of the events unfold.  A group of us opted to leave campus and head to a friend's home in Lakeland, just to get away for the day.  It was a nice escape from the devastation that happened earlier.

As the days went on, we as a nation tried to rebuild.  I remember seeing all the pictures and videos of the damage.  It was all so sombering.  I still have a copy of the Oracle, USF's newspaper, from September 12th.  It has pages of pictures from the day before, some horrible, and some inspiring.  I try to not look at it because it brings back so much emotion but I know exactly where it is.

As the 10th anniversary of this tragic day drew near, I tried to distance myself from looking at the pics and videos that were being posted online.  Not because I'm unpatriotic, but because it still makes me feel so disgusted, sad, emotional, you name it.  But it wasn't until a few days ago when I saw the picture of NYC taken from space.  There was a lone American in the space station at the time of the attacks.  He was the only American not on Earth when everything unfolded yet had a view of the damage from space.  There is a video of images he took from space with him narrating what he was seeing.  He expressed his sincere sorrow, love, and support for his fellow Americans but he ended with the most amazing words.  He said that even on this horrible day "the city still looks beautiful from space."  How true those words are.  No matter how horrible the damage, how great the loss, the city and the rest of the country joined together to support each other and move on.  How much more beautiful can you get?!?

My cousin took this picture on September 10, 2001 of the WTC.  He's doing a 365 project on Facebook taking and posting daily pics with his iPhone.  To commemorate today, he took a pic of the picture with his iPhone and editted it for his 365 project.  To know that this picture was taken in the last hours of their existance is unbelievable. 

To my aunt and cousins, thank you for changing your plans and visiting on the 10th.  Things would be so different if you hadn't.

To all the men, women, and children who lost their lives that day, we remember you, honor you , and never forget you.

To all the men, women, and children who lost loved ones that day, we rally around you, raising you up in daily prayer, asking that peace and grace surround you and help ease your pain.

GOD BLESS AMERICA

My Craft Wish List

I feel my DIY juices flowing!!!  I have found so many ideas on Pinterest of things I had planned on buying in stores that I can make myself...and save some moolah!!!  I've planned out 2 teacher gifts already, just need reasons to give them (or reasons to tell the Hubs so I can buy the supplies...love you Hubs!!!), I've already picked out potential Christmas gifts to make, and I've found so many tutorials for apothecary jars.  I have been planning a stellar Christmas decoration that I cannot wait to share with all of you for months now and all I needed were the jars.  Now I can make millions of them for half the amount of money I was willing to spend to buy them.  Look how thrifty I've become!!!

So here's just a few things I need to get all of this underway:
1. Hot glue gun.  I don't know how I've survived my adulthood without one.  And come to think of it, I think my mom always had one growing up.  Why didn't I ever get one?
2. E-6000 and Gorilla glue.  Can't glue stuff together without this (obviously when I can't use the above mentioned hot glue gun)
3. Chalkboard paint.  Any ideas about making it yourself?  I've seen a couple DIY recipes but is it better to just buy it?
4. Mason jars.  I just love them in general but I didn't realize they had so many uses!
5. A basic sewing kit.  I don't even own a needle.  Not a one.  I have tons of scrapbooking supplies and tons of ribbon but no needle and thread.  Ultimately I want a sewing machine but we'll have to work up to that. I have huge aspirations of making my own scrub tops and making dresses for Emmy
6. Buttons.  Again, I never realized the unlimited uses buttons had.  I always get rid of the extras on my clothes.  You can use buttons on anything!!!
7. Ribbon.  I have a little stash going but I need more.  Plus Emmy's hair is getting longer so soon I will be putting ribbons around her ponytails.  I also want to make hair clips for her so they are a must.
8. Fabric.  I think I need to start a fabric collection.  Not yards and yards of it but scraps of random fabrics.

That would be a great start.  I have a real desire for a Cricut machine or a Silhouette.  I love the idea of being able to cut your own diecuts and wording for scrapbooks but I really want to be able to cut vinyl.  I have so many ideas for vinyl. 

I can't wait to get crafty and of course, share it all with you! 

In non-crafting news, we took Noah to Disney on Ice last night and had a blast!  It was an awesome show and Noah (and Mommy) loved it.  Here's a pic of me and my lil man.  This is also the first time I've worn real pants in 2 weeks.  Let me tell you...after about an hour of having the button rub my incision, I was ready for my sweats.  I may or may not have had them unbuttoned during the entire performance!

I can't believe how grown up he is now!

Hope everyone is having a good football Saturday!  The Hubs's Gators won and my USF Bulls won!!!  GO BULLS!!!

    

WILW

Happy Wednesday to everyone!  I'm getting back into my old rhythm and linking up with Jamie for What I'm Loving Wednesday.  So here goes!!!

I'm loving that my amazing friend Jen had her baby!!!  Every morning I get a picture text sent to me of the cutest lil guy!  I am definitely a proud Auntie!!!  Can't wait to meet lil Colton!!!

I'm loving that I'm home and gallbladder free.  After the week in the hospital and being away from the kiddos and the Hubs, I'm thankful to be home and getting back on my feet. 

I'm loving that its football season again!!!  My Bulls did an AMAZING job beating the Fighting Irish this weekend and I can't wait for the rest of the season!  Go Bulls!!!

More importantly, I'm loving the Hubs.  Not only has he held me together through my weeklong adventure in the hospital, he managed to keep the kids feeling as normal as possible.  He's also done an amazing job taking care of me and picking up the slack while I'm a little incapable of doing too much.  Poor guy has a stomach bug right now too (although if I get it, I'll kill him....and then blog about it!!!).  I love you so much!!!  Thanks for being amazing!!!

I'm also loving that its September.  It is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month!  Gold is the ribbon color for childhood cancer and I'd love to see it as popular and recognizable as the pink ribbon.  I wanted to share a little something about the kids I work with:

They ride tricycles in the hallway, not in the park. They know the names of chemos instead of their classmates. Their central lines have names. Nurses and doctors are their new family. They think hair is overrated. Their laughter can make a heart melt. Their strength will make a grown person cry. If you've ever seen a kid fight cancer, it will change your life forever! September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, Pass It On.
How true these words are!  Help us as we fight this nasty beast!  Don't forget you can donate to my CureSearch Walk fundraising page here!

Have a great week!!!!

I see myself getting totally sucked in

I'm trying to find my way again on Pinterest.  I can totally see why people become obsessed!  I am going to lose myself in all of it's wonderfulness just like I do on Etsy!  I haven't pinned too much but my name is volley639 if you want to find me!

Nothing too much going on this week in our house.  I'm trying to recover and be able to sit upright for more than 30 minutes at a time and we're gearing up to take the kiddos to Disney on Ice this weekend!!!  I don't know who's more excited...me or them!!!

I need help.....

So I'm late to jump on the bandwagon but does anyone have any helpful hints for getting started on Pinterest?  I've been dying to jump right in and become obsessed like everyone else is but I don't know how.  Any tips on getting my feet wet???

Home and Loving it!!!!

First things first....thanks for all the well wishes.  I am excited to share that I am finally at home and gallbladder free!!!  After waiting all day on Friday (I mean literally all day), I was whisked away to the OR at 9:45pm to have my surgery.  My surgeon was nice enough to come back to the hospital, after having dinner with his family and tucking his kids into bed, to do my surgery so I could finally go home.  He went in to do some exploration to see if anything besides the gallbladder could be the culprit of my pain but all he found was my gallbladder.  I guess a layer of stomach fat had adhered to my gallbladder.  He told the Hubs that this sometimes happens after pregnancies (plus I'm fat too so I guess I was at double risk).  So regardless of my perfectly functioning gallbladder, the layer of fat was irritating it.  So he was nice enough to take it out.  I was discharged on Saturday morning and have been home since.  Today I feel more like a human.  I took a shower and can function a little better.  Sitting straight up in the chair while I type this is a little uncomfortable but I figure a little discomfort is worth it to thank all of you for your prayers!!!  This was quite the experience and my entire family is trying to get back into the swing of things (and I'm trying to get back into the swing of eating. After not eating for a week, it's kinda rough starting to eat again).

Here are the pics I've been trying to upload all week:

Some of my Get Well Goodies (a monkey balloon is missing because Noah took it home one night)

The kiddos having dinner at Mommy's home away from home.  Notice how comfy Emmy made herself

Me, looking like a hot mess, smiling because I've just had pain meds!!!

I will spare you all from seeing my actual stomach.  It's quite the sight.  But if anyone has a good technique to get all the betadine off, I'd love to hear it.  You'd think being a nurse I'd have a good solution but I've always told my patients that it just wears off (which it does) but that answer isn't flying with me since it's my belly that's yellow. 

Another exciting thing yesterday....my friend Jen had her baby!!!  Colton Alexander was born at 5:14pm and is absolutely adorable!!!  I cannot wait to meet him.  I find myself just staring at his cute little face!  I cried when she sent me his picture.  I am so proud of Jen and so happy for her to finally experience motherhood.  She is going to be the best Momma!!!

And to top off the most exciting day ever....my USF Bulls beat Notre Dame!!!  I have never been so proud to be a Bull.  The game wasn't the greatest but they capitalized on ND mistakes, BJ Daniels looked pretty good with his passing game, and they stuck it out through 2 weather delays to hang on and knock off the #16 team in the nation.  You know I was cheering as much as I could!  I even threw on my USF dress over my sweatpants just to be festive for the game! 

Me and the bestie in our USF gear for a game last year

S-O-U-T-H-F-L-O-R-I-D-A
SOUTH FLORIDA
SOUTH FLORIDA
GOOOOOO BULLS!!!!!!

I'm still here

Just wanted to pop in and say hey!  I'm still in the hospital but there's finally a light at the end of the tunnel.  After having so many tests and procedures (even a colonoscopy at the ripe old age of 29) I'm finally getting my gallbladder taken out tomorrow!!!  I don't know what time but all I know, my pain and nausea is finally going to be coming to an end.  This has been quite the experience, let me tell you.

Being stuck here for 5 days, away from my family, kids, and friends, has been pretty rough.  I'm hanging in there as best as I can.  I miss my kids so badly.  I look forward to 6:30 every night because I know I'll be getting my daily visit.  Just seeing them instantly takes my pain away.  Saying goodbye to them is so much harder on me than it is for them.  Thats been a hard thing to deal with.  Not seeing the Hubs is hard too, although its harder on him right now.  Poor guy can't sleep while I'm here.  I'm not sleeping either but at least I have drugs that help me fall asleep.  I miss just hanging out with him, even if he does drive me totally INSANE whenever I'm sick or in the hospital. I love you baby!

It's also been frustrating to understand why everything has played out the way it is.  We've all known all along that my pain has been from my gallbladder however, my gallbladder has decided to make things difficult.  All my testing have been completely negative.  So by exam and clinical presentation, I need it out.  But my imaging, there's no reason why it has to come out.  That is why I'm still here.  I've had every GI test I could have to rule every other reason out for my pain.  I don't have ulcers.  I don't have ulcerative colitis, crohns, diverticulitis, etc.  So thankfully, I have a great surgeon who is finally ready to take it out.  But that's not why its frustrating.  Its frustrating to completely understand the thought process behind this ordeal.  I get that a surgeon cannot go and cut open a patient without concrete evidence of a cause.  I totally understand that.  There's a lot of things I do in my nursing career that's based on a gut feeling but none of those things involve cutting a patient open and removing an organ.  This is the time that I wish I didn't have a medical background.  I wish I could just be mad and frustrated that I've been in here for almost 5 days, having test after test, just watching the bill increase and increase.  But I can't.  Yes I can be frustrated (and I am) but I get it.

More importantly, I have learned so much about myself as a nurse from being in the hospital.  I've been in the hospital before since becoming a nurse but never for this long.  I have been fortunate enough to have had amazing nurses (minus one) while being here. Without their excitement, personality, and genuine interest in my care, I would be a horrible mess.  These girls (and guy) take time out to really talk to me and see how I'm doing.  I have had the best nurse the past 2 nights.  She's pretty much a younger version of me.  Loud, outgoing, fun.  I just love her!  She even got in trouble last night because we were talking to loud.  We were just having a great time talking about random things (we've worked at the same hospitals, she applied to 7S a few months ago...didn't get the job, which was a HORRIBLE decision.  She would have been such an asset to 7S).  It's just been fun.  The fact that they are taking time out of their busy shifts to make sure I feel at home and comfortable has meant the world to me.  It's also made me realize how much of an impact I might have in my patient/family's experience.  Taking the extra time to pop in to see them, to spend the time getting to know them, and just giving them the opportunity to talk to someone, really does make a hospital experience a little easier.  It makes me feel good that the way I'm feeling right now as a patient is the way I could be making my patients feel.  Never in a million years did I think I'd get this much personal growth/discovery from this situation. 

Thank you to all the amazing people at Largo Medical Center.  Thanks for putting up with my crazy.  Thanks for dealing with all my visitors.  Thanks for making it feel a little less stressful for me. 

I took a pic on my phone that I was going to post here of me in my hospital bed but my email app doesn't want to work since my email got hacked 2 weeks ago.  So lucky for you guys, you don't have to see my hot mess self!!!

Wish me luck tomorrow!  I can't wait to be organ-less!!!